I do not really think about myself as someone who is worried about the way that they dress. While I do admit that I have an extensive imagination about how I would like to dress, and the daily emails that I get from many different department stores lets me know that I possibly spend too much time on their websites, at the same time I know that in my actual daily routine my dress and appearance is not what I think that it could be. While I am writing this I seem to be saying that I am unhappy with the way that I dress, and wish that I could change it, but this is not the reality. I am happy with the way that I am, but there are times when I do change in a drastic way. I guess what is happening is that I am one way for much of the time, but then every so often there are chances that I have to dress in ways that I want to be different and I take those to their fullest extent.
So getting to how I dress on a daily basis, I dress quite causal. Most days are spent in a simple shirt and jeans, with a comfortable pair of running shoes. This allows me to be comfortable for whatever is needed of me, but at the same time not so comfortable that I look as if I have walked onto campus straight from bed. I wear little makeup, and just a few jewelry, specifically a necklace that was given to me by my two parents on the day that I left to come here. This is my usual routine, but from time to time I love to dress in much more expensive clothing, and then go out with friends and show off how I look. This gives me a boost of self-confidence every time, but those times are just sparse enough to not make me too over confident.
I think that the personal beliefs that are represented in these choices are hard work, humility and from time to time self-actualization. My clothing and body modification is representative of these beliefs by showing an outer representation that is equal to my inner feelings. I try to show others that I am here to work hard, and that I will only have accomplished what I want to get done when I have finished school and become successful in a career, until then I am aware that I have much hard work in front of me, and cannot stop until I get there. There are moments when I like to show off my potential, and these are the times I shed my usual dress and go for the more extravagant. I use this as motivation for the future as well. Over the years my want and desires to become a better form of myself has limited my moments of expression, and made me more reserved, ready to work to get where I need to go.
My family was a large influence over how I act now. I was taught from a young age that in order to reach where I want to go I have to work harder than anyone else, and be the best that I can be. This is where the action of being humble in my clothing came from. If I wanted to be the best I had to realize I was not there yet, and even the way I choose clothing can influence that belief. At the same time my friends have helped me to grow outside of that limited belief. I have always had the want and desire to express myself more, and coming here at first was a way to do that more often. For a while I did stray from my values, and I was upset that I did so. Luckily for me my friends and help me to stay humble and work hard. My group of friends are very competitive with one another, always trying to show each other which one is the best at something. This drive to better others makes me realize that I need to work harder than even my close friends if I want to get where I am going. We all shop together as well, and their advice helps me to decide on what clothing to buy. So in that way my friends are even more directly involved in my choices of how I dress as well as my body modifications.