My emotional intelligence is something that I have always actively worked to improve. In the Leadership and Communications course that I took this term, I was challenged to take a closer look at myself in regards to my emotional intelligence. Working on a team project revealed some of my strengths and weaknesses.
Communication is one of my strong points. When interacting with others, I am able to exchange ideas and information clearly and without conflict. I do my best to climb down the ladder of inference and carefully explain my reasoning behind my thoughts and feelings, and I encourage others to do the same so that I can understand where they are coming from. I am also able to speak kindly and respectfully to people. This helps create a more comfortable and understanding conversational environment. Throughout this term, I had many complicated and sometimes frustrating conversations with my teammates. My ability to have a clear and respectful conversation helped relieve the tension.
Bond building with my teammates is another area in which I excel. I looked for ways to connect with my coworkers on a personal level. In our Midterm Peer Evaluations Report, one of my teammates commented on my efforts to build bonds: “On our last meeting, on Friday, he also decided to stay and hangout with the group although he had nothing to do. I think this is important as it puts the group in a more friendly personable state and it’s important to find fun out of school.” Putting in a little extra time to develop a more personal relationship can make give a friendly feel to the team. It makes it more enjoyable and makes people more comfortable to share their ideas.
The most significant emotional intelligence weakness I found was that I lack self-confidence. In our Final Peer Evaluations Report, one team member criticized me, saying, “One behavior Andy could improve on would be having confidence in the work he is doing. Oftentimes he would suggest a good idea and then follow it up with ‘I don’t know. We don’t have to do that.’ If he wasn’t immediately critical of his own ideas, it would allow our group to discuss each idea more.” When I presented ideas, I was often critical of them right away.
Sometimes, I downplayed my confidence in my ideas to avoid sounding bossy. I did not want the others to feel like I was telling them what to do. Other times, I did not believe that they were strong ideas. It bothered me that they were not fully formed and perfect from the beginning. In the future, I will share my ideas with confidence and worry less about sounding bossy because I know that my team can benefit from them.
I frequently engage in self-reflection, both inside and outside of the context of this course. I analyze my emotions and behaviors to improve myself in all aspects of my life. However, I have trouble asking others for feedback. During this class, though, I got some valuable feedback from my peers. I took their criticism and advice very seriously. When other people point out my flaws, it makes me want to change. I am very self-conscious of the way other people evaluate me.
Throughout Leadership and Communications, I became more aware of my emotional intelligence. My strengths in communication and bond building will be helpful whenever I interact with people. I also learned that I need to become more confident in my own ideas and share them without immediately criticizing them. I will work to break this habit and I will continually evaluate myself and ask for feedback from others to make sure that I am improving.
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