I am not a realist. I am an ambitious optimist. I hope for the best and plan for the best. Of course there are moments when I don’t accomplish what I had planned but I always accomplish something. I don’t look at “failed attempts” as negative. I look at them as positive learning experiences. As lessons and training sessions for whats to come. I’ve been told that often we, as people, set our goals to low, and that we often achieve them. I want to stretch myself. I want to put myself in situations that cause me to second guess myself. I want the butterflies in my stomach everyday. What would I do if I weren’t afraid? I might be a little bit farther in life than I am right now. But I think this is pretty far for someone with my background. I am Latino. My parents are from El Salvador and I am the first one in my family that will have a college degree. I am ambitious.
I want to be like a child. With the intrigue and desire for knowledge and wisdom that a toddler has. They explore everything! Everywhere they go is a new adventure! Everything they do is a new experience! They have a natural energy about them that causes people to smile and feel warmth in their presence. The blasé attitude of most people that walk around is unattractive to me. When we were kids, everyone was a friend. We had fun and played, discovered, were genuine, and looked at a world with unlimited possibilities. We didn’t have to read books about being in the moment, we just always were. I am very curious about the world around me and I wish to experience much of it by the time its all said and done.
I’ve gone this far, can’t go back now. I like to be consistent in my thoughts words and actions. Although this is at times rather difficult. Going to the gym, doing my homework, going to class, cooking, cleaning, maintaining relationships. All these activities require constant attention. Attention that I must give on a daily basis. If I’ve put in all this effort just to be were I’m at, I might as well get a reward from it. Consistency is crazy. It’s doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result someday . But that day always comes. If I’m consistent. A lot of times I dread doing the things that need to get done, but I do them anyway. I hate getting up at 5:30 in the morning to go running, but I do it anyway. I hate taking pre-workout at night to go lift weights because I have trouble falling asleep afterwards, but I do it anyway. And I hate having to wash my dishes and clean right after I cook and eat, but I do it anyway. Every time, almost everyday. Because in the end, its all worth it.