Mary Harris

1. family
2. friends
3. healthy
4. loyalty
5. enjoyment
6. integrity
7. leadership
8. service
9. independence
10.  personal development
11.  community
12. wisdom
13. security
14. personal accomplishment
15. creativity
16. location
17. expertness
18. wealth
19. power
20. prestige

Today, Sunday April 13, is a more difficult day to compare how my actions throughout the day apply to my ranking of these characteristics. Sunday, for me and for many, is a day of rest and therefore many a time I spend the day doing personal chores and activities, which can be related to independence which I ranked number 9 on the list. As for the top 5, due to their high ranking they should always be relevant to my days and therefore I can and will draw conclusions on how they affected decisions I made today.

Number 5, enjoyment, today I did things that may not have been very enjoyable at the time but will bring me joy in the coming days. For example, doing laundry and cleaning the house are not the most fun things to do, but as the week begins and I have more to do I will enjoy not having to worry about those things. Number 4, loyalty, today with some of my extra time I made sure to be true to my word of previous plans I made with friends and make future plans. Loyalty is key to the maintenance of family and friends, my number 1 and 2 on the list. By thinking of how my decisions will affect my friends and family, I am in turn being loyal. My family, number 1, and friends, number 2, are always priorities in my life and I constantly weigh my actions and choices around how they will affect those people. By enjoying what I do and being loyal to those I hold close, I am creating healthy relationships with those around me, my number 3 trait. I take healthy to not only mean physical but emotional health. Each of my top 5 traits are interdependent and rely on each other for the other to be true.

As a society we love to brand things, even people. We think that everyone and everything should fall into neat little boxes that do not overlap. We like to be able to define things because it gives us a sense of control. Due to the human need to define things, they tend to see things as black and white, yes or no, 100% or 0%, and do not understand anything in the middle. Values are what form the reasoning behind many of the decisions humans make and are completely subject to bias and personal experience and therefore they often fall into an undefined gray area. In a world that tries to categorize everything, it seems only natural that our mixed values are what create the most conflict. In this weeks reading the author uses a couple examples that incorporate mixed values, one of them being a Catholic women that describes herself as a “practicing Zen, Catholic, lesbian, feminist nun” which in our society is impossible.  Many of the adjectives this women uses to define herself have conflicting values according to the definitions society has given them over time but due to her personal experiences she relates to each one in a different way. The inability for most people to fit their values into one category and the mounting pressure to meet societies standards has led many to look to a greater authority, whether that be a god or science, to formulate their values. This dualism further isolates each group creating more defined categories. The greatest example of this can be seen with our political system. Due to the polarity that has surrounded the two party system, even though both parties are working for the so-called greater good, they cannot seem to find a middle ground that actually accomplishes that. People hear the category or name first and think of the supposed values behind it second, if ever. People see values as a brand or category rather than a lifestyle, so many say they are something without acting in a way that supports it.