Q&A:Overcoming Anorexia
By Julia Hawkes
Tatiana Tindall is a 19-year-old freshman at the University of Oregon. At the age of 13 she developed an disorder, which continued for two years. At her lowest weight of 90 pounds, Tindall continued to dance competitively until she was put into treatment for her illness at 15.
Q: During the period of your illness, how did you view your body?
A: When I was sick I absolutely hated it and there was always something wrong with it. I was never skinny enough and I was never fit enough.
Q: How did your body change during this time?
A: I became much skinner and you could kind of see my ribs. I was really pale and instead of looking fit and in shape, I looked very thin and unhealthy.
Q: How much of the visible changes do you think were intentional?
A: I wanted people to notice that I was losing weight and that I had the small, petite stature that dancers do. To an extent I think that everything was intentional. I never intended for someone to be able to see my ribs but I did it to myself. When I was 90 pounds, in my twisted mind, I was thought ‘cool I’m skinny.’ At the time I didn’t see it; I didn’t realize how unhealthy I looked. Everyone else saw it, but I didn’t.
Q: Do you think that competitive dancing played a factor in your eating disorder?
A: In competitive dance, especially when your doing ballet or contemporary, all of the girls and guys are sticks. When you are looking around and you see everyone is super thin, and you are staring at yourself in a mirror 8 plus hours a day …you just develop all of that in your mind.
Q: After treatment, how did your body change?
A: I have muscle mass, I have a figure, and I am happy where I am. I look healthy. I don’t look like the really skinny version that I was trying to get to when I was younger.
Q: Why do you think eating disorders have become so common?
A: A lot of young girls and boys I think have eating disorders because there is so much pressure from society… look at fashion magazines and ads; they are always promoting very skinny girls. We see that constantly and so we think that’s what we need to look like in order to be beautiful.