During my most recent Marketing course Spring term of 2013, my class and I found that we were being assigned random groups pretty early on in the course. It was expected of us that we would spend a great deal of time with our fellow group members to complete the huge assignment and presentation that we were assigned. I have for a great while now believed that I know myself mentally well enough to know my own strengths and weaknesses (Self Awareness). Unsurprisingly, throughout the course of the project, my personal strengths and weaknesses shined while I was amongst my group the way that I would have expected they would. After reading through the recent documents on the emotional intelligence and leadership traits I found myself very easily identifying where I placed in those traits. However, the most inspiring part was the writer’s enforcement of the idea that these characteristics can be worked upon and strengthened by anyone who desires, opposed to my previous acceptance of “it’s just who I am”.
During our project I acted as more of an inspirer and motivator. I found myself always helping my members expand upon their own ideas and tried to ensure that no one was left out of the discussions or that no one would be too nervous or ashamed to present their own ideas. I went about the project expecting everyone else to lead the way, while I just expanded upon their ideas and worked to fill in the gap to make everything come together. You could say that I played the part of the team-glue.
Though all of this may not sound all too bad, and although it’s not, I did however fail to deliver upon all the characteristics completely necessary to be a good leader as well as the best group contributor that I could have been. Though I often believe in the strengths of others, I found during the project that I frequently refrain from presenting ideas of my own and will instead work off of others ideas and thoughts, even if I feel their ideas may be flawed. I feel much of this is due to my constant anxiety of being center of attention and lack of confidence in both myself and my own ideas and abilities.
Action Plans #1 Managing My Emotions
While I am aware that I am faced with the emotional issues of nervousness/anxiety and often the lack of confidence, my ability to manage these personal emotions are where I am challenged. Without this ability, I will not be a great contributor or leader in my group. As of right now, I feel I lack the capability to MANAGE my own emotions and this in turn hinders my ability to excel. I wish to overcome my emotional flaws by going outside of my comfort zone and take action for myself occasionally. I want to come out of this feeling comfortable with myself, opposed to just acting like I am. I need to not play it safe and to instead go above and beyond and have that be where I find comfort and not let my emotions have an effect.
Action Plan #2: Modeling the Way
I often evade situations in which ideas are conversed and generated, and instead I often sit back and wait until the project get its foot in the door. I need to gain my own voice and present my own values optimistically as to express myself and my opinion without the worry of receiving negative feedback. I need to show confidence and enthusiasm, as to spread a good vibe among myself and fellow group members and become a model. For this to occur, I need to partake with my group in taking great action from the beginning all the way until the project’s end, no sitting anything out. I need not only to follow, but also lead discussions as well. I will approach this by not only taking small steps such as presenting some ideas, but by frequently jumping way out of my comfort zone with such acts as leading discussions. Upon implementing this approach, I must also have the courage to not only seek feedback from others, but to also avoid being discouraged by it. I must not accept feedback as criticism, but instead as an opportunity for me improve upon myself, allowing me to grow mentally stronger and becoming that much closer to being a great leader.