Every since daylight savings it has been getting dark too early for my liking. I’ve come to realize that if I’m not in the library before it gets dark, then I have zero motivation to go. Once the sun goes down my internal clock tells me that I need to be in my house and I become overwhelmed with exhaustion. I always tell myself that I will go home and do homework or study on my couch, but with the distraction of my roommates and my desire to hear about their days makes productive work difficult. I wish that I was capable of being productive after the sun goes down, but I still struggle daily.
I think the reason I don’t deal with the lack of light well during this time of year is because I’m from a sunny area. In Los Angeles it is sunny almost all year round and I only need to wear a sweatshirt when it gets cold. In addition, the lack of sun has made me quite pale, which sounds like a silly thing to let bother me, but it does. I can tan extremely easily and seeing myself so plane is something I don’t think I will ever get used to. I could go tanning, but I feel like I’ve done enough damage to my skin throughout the years, that a tanning bed is a terrible idea and I’m scared I’ll turn orange from a spray tan. I experience these thoughts yearly, but for some reason how early it gets dark is bothering me way more than it ever has. I need to stop letting all these little details get to me and find the motivation to brace the cold and get to the library. Once I’m there and I can’t see out a window, I will be fine, but its the actual act of walking the five blocks to get there. I should just suck it up and do it so I don’t sink into a weather depression during winter.